stepping into the certain

Last March I went on a spring break trip to Mississippi to help clean up the damage from Katrina. Being there taught me a lesson which kind of guided me in some of my decisions about my future. As I have been packing these past few days the thought, "wait.. why am I doing this again??" keeps going through my head. So this morning I was looking back at some of the motives and reasons behind taking the steps I have. Here is what I wrote March 19, 2006:

Driving through the broken, torn, crushed city was so surreal. Everything was fallen and scattered… so out of place, it just felt so wrong. You could see people's lives damaged, broken and abandoned. There was a deep sense of unstability. I could just see people spending life times to make life secure and in one day it’s gone...whole lives torn into little pieces.

So as I am about to graduate I see two options to take:

1. I feel that I can take the certain way with an underlying uncertainty. By that I mean work for myself, build up a life, build up stability and live in the hope (or fear) that nothing will devestate, damage or destroy my “earned life”.

OR

2. I feel that I can take the uncertain way with an underlying certainty. By that I mean surrendering the life I hope to build to the One who is the ultimate stability and security. I let the future I imagine and dream of go. And I take each step in God’s guidance, in trust. Never knowing what or where the next step is. This is an uncertain and unpredictable adventure. But I know that in God's hands it will be the most certain plan with certain purpose. And nothing, no flood, no storm, nobody can devestate, damage, or destroy what is founded, rooted and built by the hands of God.

Even when suffering makes it seem like it is being damaged, it is just a part of the construction, the growth, the restoration and the firm foundation.