Lessons in Ministry

My mom and my dad have been in ministry for most of their lives. They have so much experience and have worked in a few different churches and they have impacted hundreds and hundreds of lives overs the years.

The past three years I have gotten to work at the same church with them. I am so thankful to have two of the most experienced leaders to go to for leadership and ministry advice any time I need it. I have learned so much by watching them lead, watching how they work in a church, and watching how they work with people. I have gone to them for so much advice and gotten to hear their mindsets and perspectives on ministry. Here are some of the lessons I have learned from them:

• "Ministry is about people not programs." ~ Mom

• When looking for leaders, look for F.A.T. people. Faithful. Available. Teachable. Look for people who are willing to serve and do whatever. When people ask for a high position or for the spot light, see if they are willing to serve with something simple first. Take time to observe people.

• One time in ministry I kept reaching out to certain people with not much response. My mom said, "Invite less, pray more."

• One time I was in my dad's office and he pulled out his trash can and showed me that he had just thrown away this thick notebook filled with a small group strategy that he had spent years and years developing in Charlotte. "This thing, these plans that I had sleepless nights over, is in the trash now, but you know what is left from it? The relationships." And he started listing off names of people. This was a good visual that ministry is about people not programs.

• My mom leads out of prayer. She teaches her leaders how to pray, she leads everything from seeking God in prayer. And so when people ask, "Why is your ministry so successful?" She says, "We pray." "Yeah but what's your strategy for growth?" "We pray." Everything she does begins and ends with prayer.

• "If you are going to work in a church, you have to REALLY love Jesus." ~ Dad

• In a small group setting, ask people history-giving questions in the beginning of your time with them. People feel comfortable talking about what they know, everyone is an expert on their past.

• Don't attach your identity to the ministry.

• Discipleship is SO important. They gave me the book, "The Master's Plan of Evangelism" that they used in their early days of ministry. This book has shaped my value for discipleship.

• Don't implement a huge change all at once. Try something once or twice, give your self room to test things before officially implementing it.

• There is an art to asking good questions in small groups, this takes time and practice to develop.

• When I'm scared about loosing my job cause not enough people are coming to things, my mom tells me I just have to rest in the fact that I'm following God, I am giving my best and then to trust God with the results.

• Take a day off to NOT work, keep it the Sabbath and let yourself rest from your work. They've never said this, I've just watched them do it for 28 years.

• The importance of keeping your own relationship with God strong and healthy by spending time alone with him every morning. Again, they don't talk much about this, I've just watched them do it for 28 years. And I believe their effectiveness in ministry stems from the vitality and richness of their own relationships with God.

Thank you Mom and Dad for these lessons and so many more through your words and your example. I love you guys and I'm thankful to learn from you!

The water fountain, Pink, and the seamstress

A few analogies I've been thinking about:

On waiting:
One day on my run I was so thirsty, it takes a good 45 minutes to get to the water fountain. The wait and the run makes the drink of water all the more satisfying, refreshing and wonderful. Before a run when I have a drink of water it's just... water... it's just a sip or two, it's not that great. But on the run, the harder and harder I run, the longer I run, the more I work up a desire for water. With each step I am getting closer and closer to the water fountain yet it feels further and further away. When I finally get there the drink is a million more times rich and satisfying and good. I don't just drink it, I pour it all over my face and my body. I never love water as much as I do on a run.

And so when you are waiting a long time on God for something, it's like the longer you wait, the harder the wait feels, the further away the thing feels. But when he finally provides, it's better and more appreciated than it would've been if you would have gotten it before you worked up a desire for it. Kinda like the drink before the run as opposed to the drink 45 minutes into the run.

"A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul.." Proverbs 13:19

On idols:
One night a long time ago I was watching Behind the Music on Pink. She talked about how the ultimate experience was to have her idol, the woman she looked up to so much come to meet with her and to have understanding from a person she idolized and respected so much. She said she felt understood by someone who had changed her life. That got me thinking about us and God.

The God who wrote the Bible, who rules the universe and creatively designed us and nature and all of life, the God who conducts the movement of the stars and planets and the universe like a symphony, the God who paints the skies with the colors of sunsets and sunrises... This God put us before himself. He laid down the life of his Son for us. He has the highest voice, the highest opinion, he is the only one in the universe who should be idolized and worshipped. And He is the one who meets with you, understands exactly what you go through and he even knows why and gives meaning and purpose to those things. He "gets" you on all levels. If we believed it, if we really really believed it, it would change everything for us.

On complaining Christians:
I have these sheets that I LOVE, I have had them forever, but the corners where you put them over your mattress began to tear. So I took them to a seamstress to be sewed up. This little old woman was working there. I showed her my sheets and what I wanted fixed. And she was like, "Oh you can totally do that yourself." I was like, "No, I don't know how to sew" and in my head, I'm thinking, "That's why I'm bringing them to you. I want to pay you to fix them." But she refused to take them, instead, she taught me how to sew. She was like I'm gonna teach you how to sew them up so you don't have to waste your money here. Not a good business plan... but I learned to sew and fixed my sheets my self.

One of the biggest complaints I hear from Christians is, "I'm just not getting fed there." And I just think we kinda expect to go to church and get fixed by the words of the preacher or our experience at a church. But what if we learned to feed ourselves? What if Christians weren't so entitled to good teaching and disciplined themselves enough to sit down with the Bible and learn for themselves. And let God teach them how to hear from him and be fed by his Word with out always depending on or blaming another person for "feeding" or "not feeding" them. I think that would be good... but that's just me. Like learning to sew my own sheets :)