some stories and experiences

Learning a new language can be really funny at times. I knew some Portugese before I came here and a lot of the words are similar to Spanish. So I have this thing, "when in doubt throw in a portugese word and see if it works!" On my homework the other night I had to do an excersice of completing the sentence. So it said "Tomorrow I will......" and I put "ligar mi madre." Which I thought meant "call my mom" because in portugese the verb "to call" is "ligar"... but here it means "to flirt" hahaha so on my homework I said "Tomorrow i will flirt with my mom." hahaha....haahhaahha

One day I was walking down the street and saw some guys I met last week when I was playing volleyball at the university. The guys were all about to go get coffee and invited me. So I went thinking it would be a great time to practice my Spanish. We were having so much fun and then out of no where one of the guys asked what religion I am. He told me he didn't believe there was a God. He said he needs to believe something, but not God. Everyone at the table started talking about if God exists. He asked me me why I believe. So I really got to share the Gospel in that time. It was so cool! Even though my Spanish very lacking in vocabulary, verb tenses and congegations, it really made me say the Gospel in its purest/ bluntest/simplest form (with out trying to say it in a socially acceptable way like I would in English).

The other day I was sitting on a park bench looking at my map trying to figure out where I was going and these 2 old women came up to me and they were like, "Do you understand Spanish? (in Spanish)" and I told them "a little." So they said, "We think Dios (God)".. while pointing to the sky... "i love you (then pointing to me)... Dios, I love you...Dios, I love you." Which I'm pretty sure meant "God loves you" and I said, "awwwwwwww I love you too!" Which I meant to say "he loves you too"...haha.. but I think we all got our points across. Then they said, "think about that... that's all" and walked away.

One day I was at Hipercor (kind of a Spain version of Target) and the casheir looked at my recipt and was like "ooh!!... and started telling me something she seemed very excited about in Spanish. I told her I didn't understand Spanish. So the woman behind me in line thought she could explain it better by telling me in louder Spanish. Then they thought I'd surely get it if they both spoke louder, faster, AND at the same time. And I was just laughing and like, "guys I don't understand no matter what volume level you speak at." So they took me over to a counter and basically I won like 5 euros off my next purchase at Hipercor. So after all this she gave me my bags and I went home. In all the confusion she ended up giving me my bags and someone elses. hahha so I got like 3 bags of free fruit!

To say I'm hungry you say "I have hunger". The word for hungry is hambre... The word for man is hombre. SO for about the first week whenever I was trying to tell someone I was hungry... I was basically telling them "I have a man". hahaha

The first night I moved into my apt. my roommates took me out with them to meet their friends and go dancing. I really got a taste of the culture through the music and dance that night/morning.... We got home at 7:00 and i went to bed at 7:30 that morning. That was by far the latest I've ever stayed out...but its all part of soaking in the culture and involving myself in these people's lives.

Two weekends ago I got to go on an incredibly beautiful hike in the sierra nevada mountains with some people I met at church. We walked along the mountain ridges and over looked the city and other mountain ranges. The whole time I was thinking "I can't believe I am here now! doing this!" I was definetly sore the next few days. I started walking at 10:00 that morning and stopped at 5:00 when I got home.

Yesterday on the elevator the man asked me where I was from. I told him "Carolina de Norte" and l drew big circle with my finger on the elevator wall and said, "ok this is the United States... here is North Carolina." He asked how long I have been speaking Spanish and I said only for three weeks. I told him that I think all Spaniards are very intelligent because they know Spanish!" haha I think he appreciated my compliment!

Today I was doing laundry out on our terrace and the door shut behind me and locked. There is absolutly no other way in besides that door... and my roommates are conviently out of town. So I leaned over the balcony and was like, "hola?? hello? someone? ayudar! (to help!)" I kept banging on my door trying to get it open and woman across from me and up leaned out her window and saw me. I was like, "por favor!!" I started explaining to her that i was locked out. She was so kind (even though we could barely communicate) and started throwing all kinds of things from her window (on the 7th floor across to me on the 6th). She threw a knife wrapped up in bags, with a rope attached so I could pry it open. Then we decided that the only way in was for me to break the glass. Next she threw me a hammer and chisle. This whole time, I am barely understanding what she is instructing me to do (bc of spanish). Finally I shattered the glass and got back inside and didn't even get cut!

people versus places

"Humans are satisfied with whatever looks good. God probes for what is good" ~ proverbs 16:2 (msg)

If I had to put in order the top three things I love the most it would be: God, people, and beautiful places. I love these things so much! As I was looking around Granada for an apartment I was so wanting to live in a cool apartment with a beautiful view of the mountains with little terraces and lots of sun light coming in. (every time our family moves to a new house, my mom makes sure to give me the room with the window that faces the direction of where the sun rises.... that is how important a room filled with sunlight is to me.) I spent about a week looking at apartments and couldn't find one that looked good enough. I found one with cool girls, but the apartment had no view and not a lot of sunlight.

Then I remembered I have been asking for prayer that God would provide a place for me to live with roommates that I could find connection with and friendship with... not for a cool looking apartment. As I kept looking every door kept shutting and this one apartment with the girls was still open. So I gave up my love of beautiful places to live here. I have only lived here for a few days and have already fallen in love with my new roommates. They are so fun and have really welcomed me into their lives. Now I love this place, it has become beautiful to me because of the people in it.

So I have learned again this re-occuring lesson of my life. Living well is not about living in a nice place or a beautiful place, but it is about the people our lives intersect with, the people we live with and share life with. I learned this 4 months ago when I didn't want to move to memphis...because... well, its memphis...but then God introduced me to a whole new world of friends there.

Then I think about how Jesus was like in paradise and left heaven to come to earth... to come to this place we made dark by our sin to restore light by showing us what real love is. He left the most beautiful place to come and intersect his life with ours on the most personal level.

I am learning that love really is the greatest priority and purpose in life.

That is why I must continuously remind myself of how much God loves me by looking at how he proved it on the cross by taking death to give me life, by forsaking his own son in his most painful moment in order to be with me in all my moments. To be grateful for the reality of redemption and his righteousness which is credited to such an undesrving person. That is real love. Remembering this, looking at this and experiencing what that really means enables me to love.

This apartment experience has showed me how he loves even on the most personal levels by not always giving me what I want because it looks good, but by "giving me what is good", what he wants... what he knows is best. And what is best always has to do more with loving people rather than loving places.

a freshman in life

I am in Spain now and it still seems so surreal. I really like walking around Granada and experiencing such a different place in the world. It is so...foriegn... It is a really cute city. I like looking at all the newness around me especially the mountains surrounding the city (I can't wait to run through them during the sunrise while listening to the Chariots of FIre soundtrack!)

So I only know a few phrases in Spanish so far. It is hard not even being able to do my own major (communications) here... haha isn't that ironic? For the past four years I have studied, tested on and written papers about talking with people (communicating) and now I am living in a place that doesn't really highlight my area of expertise. But I am excited to learn a new language! I start spanish class next week. I guess I can just look at it like an extension to my orginal major...like getting an unofficial masters!

The only thing I can relate this expereince to is to being a freshman in colllege. I remember driving to Boone with Mom and Dad and John and being so nervous and excited to start a new life there. I was so curious if I could and how I would make friends on my own. One day early on I specifically remember sitting in the McAlister's on campus watching all of the students flooding in the doors and thinking, "oh my gosh there are so many people here... I want to know them all!" In all my nervousness and excitement I jumped into the college culture and found people there who embraced me, took me in and introduced me to so many friends.

So now as I come here I feel the same nervousness/excitement. I want to make friends here and jump into the Spanish culture. I want to learn how to communicate...again... I want to expereince this expereince to the fullest. There are so many college students here (80,000) and I want to know them all! haha well...you know...as many as I can in the next year and a half. So here I am in Granada, Spain... I really feel like a freshman all over again, except this time on a more extreme level... like a freshman in life.

stepping into the certain

Last March I went on a spring break trip to Mississippi to help clean up the damage from Katrina. Being there taught me a lesson which kind of guided me in some of my decisions about my future. As I have been packing these past few days the thought, "wait.. why am I doing this again??" keeps going through my head. So this morning I was looking back at some of the motives and reasons behind taking the steps I have. Here is what I wrote March 19, 2006:

Driving through the broken, torn, crushed city was so surreal. Everything was fallen and scattered… so out of place, it just felt so wrong. You could see people's lives damaged, broken and abandoned. There was a deep sense of unstability. I could just see people spending life times to make life secure and in one day it’s gone...whole lives torn into little pieces.

So as I am about to graduate I see two options to take:

1. I feel that I can take the certain way with an underlying uncertainty. By that I mean work for myself, build up a life, build up stability and live in the hope (or fear) that nothing will devestate, damage or destroy my “earned life”.

OR

2. I feel that I can take the uncertain way with an underlying certainty. By that I mean surrendering the life I hope to build to the One who is the ultimate stability and security. I let the future I imagine and dream of go. And I take each step in God’s guidance, in trust. Never knowing what or where the next step is. This is an uncertain and unpredictable adventure. But I know that in God's hands it will be the most certain plan with certain purpose. And nothing, no flood, no storm, nobody can devestate, damage, or destroy what is founded, rooted and built by the hands of God.

Even when suffering makes it seem like it is being damaged, it is just a part of the construction, the growth, the restoration and the firm foundation.